I met a friend at restaurant bar the other night and I arrived early. While I was waiting I was approached by a man I didn’t know. He gave a quick smile and began to chat me up. He was pleasant and generally nice. I smiled briefly back and reciprocated the conversation about the weather. I wasn’t interested in him and wasn’t particularly interested in chatting with him, but didn’t want to be rude. After several minutes the casual conversation turned to personal as he asked if I was waiting for someone. I said yes. He persisted by asking if it was my boyfriend. I said no it was a friend but that I did have a boyfriend. But wait, this is where it gets interesting. He then felt comfortable enough in our new friendship to inform me that a boyfriend isn’t a husband and that he would like to exchange numbers. As much as I appreciated that offer (not really) I informed this man that I was indeed in a relationship and that exchanging numbers was not a part of my evening’s agenda. With that, he gave a very audible “hymph” and told me “good luck”. Just then my friend arrived; I gave a quick goodbye to Mr. Nice Try and left the bar. As my friend and I were seated at a nearby table, I could see this man glance in my direction and pointing me out to his buddies. That’s when I saw it, one of his buddies made the internationally known sign for snob by pointing his nose up with his finger. That’s right! Somehow, my not being interested in him made me a snob. Never mind that I had a boyfriend, was meeting a friend, or that I just wasn’t into him, I was a snob. To tell you the truth I wasn’t bothered at all by it but found it interesting how men’s minds work.
I have heard the men in my life complain how women act stuck up or snobby when they’re just trying to be nice and talk to them. Well, believe it or not women are generally not stuck up bitches or snobs. Most women are equipped with a sophisticated asshole screening device or” wall”. This genetic asset is born in all women; however, it is completely customizable. Each woman’s screening device has been modified by the unique experiences that woman has encountered. The more annoying, aggressive or dense the men she has come into contact with in her life, the thicker the “wall” and more cold or bitchy she may appear. Let’s face it, some men just don’t get the hints when a woman isn’t interested in him. Some men mistake a woman being polite as a cue that there’s still a window of hope to hook up, so women have to resort to being blunt and somewhat rude to get him to back down. You repeat this scenario over and over for 10-15 years, and yes, women start to get a little pissy.
My advice to men is to not be too quick to judge women you meet and try not to be put off or offended if a woman seems like a snob on the surface. She may be a nice girl who has a highly developed asshole protection device.